On Sunday afternoon a very dear friend, Lanie Schwarz, passed away after suffering a stroke on Friday. Lanie was amazing person, and for a number of years was like a second mother to me. Lanie and her husband Lew were members of the Synagogue where I grew up in Union NJ. My family knew them because they had sent their kids to the Solomon Schechter School in Union that I also attended. Their kids were a little older, but being that we were all active in our Synagogue I would see them quite often. When their kids were at Schechter, they began to live a more Jewishly observant lifestyle which included Shabbat Observance. When I was in college and became Shomer Shabbat myself, I would often stay at their house when I came home for Shabbat because my parents lived too far from the Synagogue and I wanted to attend Synagogue.
As time went on, I would end up spending countless Shabbatot with them. We would talk about all kinds of topics, but a lot of the time I would hear Lanie talk about her kids and eventually her grandkids. I know that she loved them all greatly and she clearly smiled more when she was talking about them. But smile is what she did most of the time. Lanie was a woman who I saw as happy with her life and a person who loved people. After some time Lew and Lanie moved from Union to Randolph, and a few years later, my parents moved to the same development so I continued to see them frequently over the years (my parent’s new home is walking distance to the Synagogue and around the corner from the Schwarz’). One of my fondest memories of Lanie was when she was dancing at my wedding. Two of her children are married with children, but I think she saw my wedding as the wedding of another of her “kids” and she danced as a parent would dance at the wedding of their child.
Lanie was the ultimate dugma (example) for Hachansat Orchim (welcoming guests). In Union, aside from having me at her home, she would have USYers stay there when her kids were in high school. She would have guest lecturers stay there when they came to our Synagogue. In Ranolph, she would be first in line to offer her home for any guests coming for s’machot (festive occasions). Her life was an example of Jewish living that we all should strive to emulate. As long as we can continue to live up to her dugma, her life will continue on through all of us.
Lanie died as she lived, at peace with the world. Her children and grandchildren were there to see her before she left and she was able to speak with them. I know that wherever her soul is now, she is grateful for the time she spent in life and extremely proud of all of our children and grandchildren. May her memory be for a blessing.